I'd been unemployed before. But I'd never been on Unemployment before. That makes things a little different. You know that if you don't get a job, you still have money coming in that isn't given to you by your parents. It changes your level of desperation in trying to find a job.
During the summer of 1993, I put in a lot of applications. I would go to the malls and fill out the forms, but no one called me back. I also scanned the classified ads. I would find job titles that appealed to me, but somehow, they all appeared to be telemarketing. This really irritated me. I would go somewhere to apply and there would be a lot of other people applying. We would listen to their spiel for about 15 minutes before they revealed that we were going to be making cold calls to sell stuff.
Once, I decided to fight back. I went to one place searching for a "customer service" position. I got there and another person came in. We were waiting to talk to a recruiter. During this time, we could hear someone SCREAMING at an employee about not sticking to the script. This person went on a rant that was a combination of the "Brass Balls" speech delivered by Alec Baldwin in "Glengarry Glen Ross" and the "Nothing" berating by Kevin Spacey in "Swimming with Sharks." This guy was yelling about how large his paycheck was because he stuck to the script. I knew then that this was another telemarketing job. On top of that, it would be a high-pressure situation.
I should have left after that, but I wanted to make a statement. After the "encouragement session" was over, a woman came out and brought the two of us into that same room. She gave a little background and got to the part where we would be calling people to offer services. I said, "This is not customer service! This is telemarketing. Why didn't you put in the ad that this was telemarketing? This is a waste of my time." She replied, "It's not telemarketing because we're calling people who asked us to call them. But I don't like your attitude and I don't want you working here!" I just walked out the door. I hadn't planned anything to say beyond what I did, so she wound up getting the last word. I wish I had told her about us hearing someone get yelled at for ten minutes straight and how that doesn't happen if this was really customer service.
I responded to another ad for "operators." When I called, I was told to arrive at the address at a certain time. I went into a room with about 40 other people. Already, this didn't look good. This man came before the group and introduced himself. He talked about advertising on TV and radio and how if you didn't get the results you wanted, you couldn't get your money back. They had an advertising method that guaranteed results. If the customer didn't get the results they wanted, they would get their money back. I wondered if we were going to be selling advertising. The product was one of those large coupon books from local businesses that cost about $50 each. He said that when we sold them, people who bought them would be able to get a free room in Vegas on a weekday. He said it was easy for them to arrange for rooms. At this point, I thought that maybe we were selling these coupon books to people who were calling in to order them. This still seemed acceptable. Then he said, "And we sell these books by calling up customers." Now, I knew for certain what was up.
I wasn't going to try to make a scene like I did the last time. I just got up and walked out of the room without saying anything. After I got outside, I looked back. About 15 people were behind me. I don't know if they had planned to do the same thing ahead of time or if they were just following my lead. At any rate, I felt like I'd had some influence this time.
And this made me wonder about telemarketing. The turnover rate has to be astronomically high. I would imagine that out of every 100 people these companies hire, maybe one person is able to do the job successfully on a continuous basis. That weeding out process must make up for about 90% of their costs. How were these companies able to maintain themselves when the cost of recruiting and staffing ate up so much of their profits? I guess they figured that once they got the ideal staff, they could stop recruiting and just concentrate on the sales. However, the people who work their way up the ladder with a certain company likely go on to a larger telemarketing company and make more money, so they have to start the process all over again. It's too bad they didn't have a better way to recruit than to mislead your average jobseeker with a promise of gainful employment.
But of course, this all impacted a chance I had at a real job. I responded to an ad for an operator. I thought it was another telemarketing position, but I still wanted to check it out. But this time, I didn't try to make myself look good. I didn't tie my long hair in a ponytail. I didn't wear my best clothes. I probably didn't shave. I was told to show up at a specific time. There were about 30 other people gathered for the recruitment. Yes, this all looked familiar.
However, it turned out that this was a legitimate company that provided 411 services for people with cell phones. WHAT? I was stunned! More and more people were getting cell phones, but they didn't connect to the regular 411 service reached by landline users. The company actually made its money when someone would call directory assistance and then have the operator transfer them to the number they requested. I guess if you were rich enough to own a cell phone at the time, you didn't care about an additional 50 cent charge to be connected via Directory Assistance. The recruiters even relayed a story about how a cell phone user was stuck on his boat in the ocean. He couldn't call 911, but he could call 411 and they were able to coordinate the call to connect him to 911.
I felt bad about not getting spruced up. I figured my appearance was going to cost me the job. However, the recruiters mentioned that they were looking to hire for overnight shifts. I figured this was my best chance to get hired. After the presentation, I approached them and told them I was interested in the overnight shift. They said they would consider my application.
A few days later, I got a call from them to set up an interview. I figured my interview would be with one of the recruiters I had already met. While I got a little more dressed and shaved before I went there, I decided not to wear my hair in a ponytail. I thought that since they'd already seen me with my hair like that, that damage was already done. I arrived on time and was taken to a room. A man whom I hadn't met before came into the room and did the interview. Again, I felt like a schmuck.
I remember one of the first lessons from my Job Interview Techniques class in college: "You never get a second chance to make a first impression." My professor should have amended that with, "...but with every interview you attend, act like you have to make a first impression." The interview went okay, but I didn't get the job. I was REALLY mad at those telemarketing companies now.
And then there was that job prospect that turned out to be a fool's errand. I saw that the San Diego International Airport was hiring people to work the kiosks. They were paying a decent amount, so I thought I'd call them up. I arranged for an interview on a certain day and time. I showed up at the airport and went to the Human Resources department. I was told to take a seat as the recruiter was interviewing someone else. While I was waiting, I suddenly heard yelling: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE'S NO POSITIONS AVAILABLE? WHY DID YOU CALL ME DOWN HERE? THIS IS A F****** WASTE OF MY TIME!" I saw a woman storm out of the office.
I didn't know what to think about this. It didn't make sense that they would call candidates over just to tell them there were no jobs. The bad part about this was that I had to pay for my parking and they made no offer for validation. This interview for a non-existent position was going to cost me a dollar. I don't blame that woman for getting mad. However, I knew that putting on a show like that would definitely make them not want to hire me, so I decided to just go along with it and be quiet in the chance that they were perpetuating a hoax just to see how the candidates react to bad news.
When I went in, the woman told me they didn't have anything available. I said, "Okay." The woman went on to describe the position and mentioned that it was a union job. This probably explained what happened. They likely just filled the positions with employees who were current union members and had shut down the recruiting right before the other woman and I got there. However, the recruiter didn't explain this. As it turned out, they didn't hire me. So much for taking the high road on that one.
I did eventually get my self un-unemployed. But before I accomplished that, things got a whole lot worse for me personally.
More on that Monday.
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