Monday, April 28, 2014

A good girl gets pregnant

In Friday's post, I explored the bad girls I called Druds, who never seemed to get pregnant. Today, I will relate the story of a nice girl who did.

I first met Leez when I was in the sixth grade. She was a year ahead of me in school. She was brought in to play the piano for the choir. She walked in the room and I was immediately attracted to her. She had almost-medium length dark blonde hair and a few freckles. She played the piano very well and was also in band. However, once the teacher announced she was in the seventh grade, I knew that I wasn't going to get to know her on a deep personal level.

I pretty much didn't get to talk to her the entire year. When I was in the seventh grade, she was in junior high school. When I got there, she was in my Choir class. However, all I was able to do was admire her during the class and during the lunch choir. I was amazed at her talent in playing the piano. I knew she could play other instruments as well. When our choir did a presentation of "The Littlest Angel" for Christmas, she and I both played star polishers. There was a picture in the paper that included all the star polishers and we were both in it.

After ninth grade, I was looking forward to seeing Leez again in high school. But that didn't happen. She wasn't in Choir and I didn't see her in band. I didn't know where she went to. Several weeks later, my family started a Saturday morning tradition in which we all would go eat breakfast at Tastee Freez. I saw Leez there. She had a baby. It also looked like she had gotten married.

This shattered my perception of her: OH, MY GOSH! SHE HAD SEX WITH SOME GUY, GOT PREGNANT AND WAS FORCED TO MARRY HIM AND DROP OUT OF SCHOOL! I never expected this out of her. She was so smart and talented, I couldn't believe that some guy could just talk her into having sex with him.

Like Rhod in the previous post, I felt like this just stifled her ability to become someone extraordinary and it all went away just because she met a guy she could not resist. Marriage and children should have come later for her.

Every week, my family went to Tastee Freez, and I almost always saw her there. She seemed to be happy hanging out with his family. I remember her wearing a t-shirt that had an iron-on design that said "Teething is the pits!" It's supposed to be put on a t-shirt for the baby, but she put it on hers with the added phrase "Believe Me!" It pained me that I would never get to know her or become good friends.

Even though my family tradition of going to Tastee Freez lasted through my senior year, I didn't see her with her family after my sophomore year. I guess they found someplace else to eat on Saturday morning. As usual, I was not able to find Leez anywhere on the Internet. I hope she's okay and was able to find a better path after her child (and other potential children) grew up.

Eventually, I had to accept the fact that every girl is capable of getting pregnant. It doesn't matter if you're the smartest or the stupidest. I also had to realize that a girl having sex with some guy is no reflection on her intelligence. It's a choice that she is free to make, and should be able to do that without any hollow judgment directed at her. I wish I had come to this realization when I was a teenager. I would have stopped looking down on "nice" girls who got knocked up.

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