I had mentioned meeting Dawz before on a couple of occasions in relation with my DECA activities. She appeared to be impressed with me and we were able to have good conversations when we saw each other. When I saw her at the state conference, I was able to get her address so I could write her.
I sent her a letter explaining about myself. At the time, I thought I had put myself in a good light. However, I waited several weeks for her to reply. When she wrote, she mentioned something about some issues going on with her family and that's why it took so long to write back. I found the letter she sent me recently, and I realized that I had to have come across as a real dork when I originally wrote to her. I don't remember everything I wrote, but she responded to a lot of the stuff that I mentioned, such as how I liked to play video games. I probably also wrote something about what music I listened to and what TV shows I liked to watch. I look back at that and think how the person who sent her that letter came across as a real loser. That's stuff I would never write about now.
I also told her I was going to go to Eastern New Mexico University when I graduated. She mentioned that she hadn't figured out which college she would go to, but would probably attend New Mexico State University. I actually did consider doing the "Felicity" thing (16 years before that show came on the air), going to NMSU instead so I could get to know her better.
I'm pretty certain I sent her another letter, but she never wrote back. However, I knew I would run into her again at the DECA National Conference in Chicago. My first day there, I did indeed find her and hung out with her the early part of the first evening. We walked around the conference showroom and talked. I asked her if she was still going to go to NMSU. She said she had decided to go into the Air Force instead. At that instant, I knew that any chance for her to be my girlfriend was dead.
My knowledge of life in the military was very limited. But the one thing I happened to know was that women in uniform almost never dated civilians. (This, even though military men were often known for chasing women off base.) I may have been willing to change my college plans, but there was no way I was going to join the Air Force for this girl. It was really too bad, because I thought we were a perfect match intellectually.
I didn't get to hang around her for the rest of the conference. She happened to be on the same bus I was riding on the way to Marriott's Little America (the day I was sick). I saw her get on the bus, pass right by me and sit in the back. She did not appear to be in a good mood. I don't even know that she was aware I was on the bus. After my bowel issues, I knew it wouldn't be a good idea to try to hang around her at the park (even though I didn't have any more problems after leaving the nurse's station).
The bus ride to Little America would be the last time I would ever see her or hear from her. A few years ago, I looked her up on the Internet. I found that she had indeed married someone from the Air Force and had children. At the point that I discovered her, she had been stationed in Hawaii, retired from the military and had started her own software consulting business. I found photos of her from her retirement ceremony. There was this one slacker-looking guy standing next to her wearing a Hawaiian shirt. THIS WAS THE GUY SHE MARRIED! I guess he had retired sometime earlier and went straight to looking like a civilian. This was a guy with my level of attractiveness.
A couple of years later, I found that she had divorced that guy and was still living in Hawaii. I found her profile on LinkedIn and sent her an invitation to connect, but I have a feeling she just set up the account and forgot all about it. This means she probably never saw the note I wrote her reminding her who I was. At least, I hope that's what happened. I noticed that her account is no longer active.
But she does have a current Facebook account. The only things I'm able to see are a couple of photos. It appears that she hooked up with some Hawaiian guy and that's all the information I can get.
I look back at Dawz as the "one who got away." I absolutely think we would have been just right for each other. If she hadn't told me she was going into the Air Force, I probably would have made more of an effort to spend more time with her at the DECA Conference. I have a feeling that her mystery family issues came into play when she decided to join the Air Force.
However, even though I think we would have made a great match doesn't mean that she would have ever seen me the same way, especially after that letter I wrote. I'd like to think that if she really felt anything for me, she would have followed me to ENMU, or at least, written me more before she went into boot camp.
If I had wound up with her, I'd like to think I'd be living in Hawaii right now, hanging out with Rad.
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