I met Priz a few times in 1992. She was a good friend of Lyd, our Chief of Staff. She would come over and see her at the Hillcrest Cinemas. Sometimes we would talk to each other if Lyd was a little busy. I knew that I thought she was cute, even if she was a little overweight. She was rather funny and could usually make me laugh.
In August of 1992, she came to the theatre, saw me and said, "Hi, sexy!" This stunned me. I hadn't considered the thought that she might find me attractive. I began to wonder about my chances of going out with her. So, I did something I never thought I would do: get a third party involved. When Lyd and I were alone in the Manager's office one day, I asked her if she knew if Priz liked me. She said that Priz would sometimes ask about me. "Were you interested in going out with her?" I nodded my head. "Okay, I'll talk to her and see what she thinks." I told her thanks.
The next day, Priz called me at the theatre. "I understand you want to go out?" I told her I was interested in getting to know her better and we made arrangements to go out on one of my nights off. I thought it would be a good idea to get something to eat. I chose the Italian restaurant I ate at when I first met Ved and Anz. Priz said she would come by my apartment and pick me up. She was living with her father at the time and wasn't ready for me to meet him. I didn't have a problem with that.
While I was waiting for her, I was doing stuff on my keyboard. She arrived pretty much on time. Before she got to my front door, she came across a cat that was hanging around my front door. I could hear her say, "Hey, kitty kitty." I met her at the door. She asked if it was my cat. I told her I couldn't have any pets. She came inside and immediately commented on the size of the apartment. We walked out to her vehicle. She said, "Now, just because I drive a pickup doesn't mean I'm a dyke!" I was not aware of that stereotype at the time.
We then left and went to the restaurant. We both ordered individual pizzas. During our conversation, we got into past relationships. (Yeah, I know. You're not supposed to talk about this on a first date.) I told her I went eight years between girlfriends. Then she said, "Wait a minute! How old are you?" I told her I was 27 and about to turn 28 in the next month. "Okay, that's not too bad. I'm 23." But we didn't spend much time after that talking about our exes. She told me about her friend Ard, whom she and Lyd hung around with on a regular basis. She said that she had suspected Ard was a lesbian and that she and Lyd tried to get Ard to come out by pretending they were kissing each other. Somehow, that didn't work.
We took the leftovers and went back to my apartment. I told her that I had moved in so recently, that I hadn't even put anything in the refrigerator yet. She said, "Well, let me be the one to break that cherry," as she put the leftover pizza inside. (I never ate that pizza. It had onions on it!) She then asked if I wanted to go see the roller coaster at Mission Beach. I said sure and we went back out to the pickup and drove off. We arrived at Belmont Park a few minutes later. I was surprised that this little amusement park with a wooden roller coaster was there. I had done very little driving around since I moved to San Diego. It wasn't like how I did a lot of running all over the place in Denver my first year there. (However, that's also because I didn't need to look for a job once I got to San Diego.)
We got on the roller coaster and it was a thrilling two-minute ride. Afterward we started walking around the park. At this point, Priz started holding my hand. I was a little shocked by this, but ran with it. I was glad to be having as good a time as this on a first date. We went on the roller coaster one more time before we left. It was probably more fun the second time, because I put my arm around her.
She drove me back to my apartment to drop me off. Before I got out of the pickup, she signaled by putting her fingers up to her lips. I gave her a quick peck. She put her fingers up to her lips again and I gave her another quick peck. Then we started holding each other and kissing more passionately. We didn't do anything more. I told her I had a really good time and I would be calling her again. I was really happy that she became my girlfriend that quickly.
I called her a couple of days later. She asked if I wanted to go hang out in Balboa Park on Saturday. Again, she came by and picked me up. We went to the park and walked all over the place. At one point we were on a grassy area. She said, "I'll bet I can toss you over my back." "I'd like to see you try!" Sure enough, she was able to grab me and toss me over her back. That was kind of freaky. After we'd had enough of the park, she said we should get something to eat. She suggested "Jack in the Crack." This was the first time I'd ever heard anyone refer to Jack in the Box by that name, but I guess it was pretty common, because about a year later, they also did that in the film "Menace II Society."
We got the hamburgers and went back to my apartment. After we were done eating, we started making out. It was getting really intense. And then she tried to get me to do something of a sexual nature, but I resisted her trying to put my hand in a certain area on her body. She stopped what she was doing and asked what was going on. That's when I had to tell her I was a virgin and that I wasn't quite ready for that. She seemed to understand and we went back to making out. Before she left, she started giving me hickeys. I said, "No, don't! I have to work! I can't go to work with hickeys!" But she wouldn't stop. When she finished, she said, "Now, everybody knows you're mine!" She had to leave and I had to get ready for work. We made tentative plans to see movie the next week.
When I got dressed for work, my collar didn't quite cover up one of the hickeys. I hoped none of the employees would notice. The entire evening, no one said anything. Later, when we were alone in the office, Anz asked, "Fayd, are those hickeys?" "I tried to get her to stop, Anz, but she wouldn't! I thought no one could see it, because I was expecting all sorts of catcalls from the staff." "Well, you know what they say: A moment on the lips, a lifetime on your neck. Make sure that clears up soon."
She had called and left a message on my machine to call her at Ard's house so we could set up our next date. I did that and we decided to go see "Unforgiven." This time, I was going to drive to Ard's house, park the car and she was going to drive us over to her house. (Her father wasn't going to be home.) We went over there, but she still needed to take a shower. After she got out, we made out a little bit before heading to the theater. We were cutting it really close. (I'm really particular about showing up on time for a movie.) Instead of getting on the highway, she took a frontage road. She swore it was going to be faster. When we passed the time the movie was supposed to start, she said, "Oh, I guess we should have taken the highway!" YES! WE SHOULD HAVE TAKEN THE HIGHWAY!
We did get there late and missed the first 15 minutes of the movie. However, we still enjoyed it. I had to get to work, so we drove back to Ard's house and I went straight home.
A couple of days later, I tried to call her at her house. Her father picked up the phone and said she was at Ard's. So I called Ard's number. Priz picked up the phone. I said, "Hi, Priz! This is Fayd!" "Uh, Fayd? You're not supposed to be calling me here." "But..." "This isn't my house and this isn't my phone. I can't have you calling me when I'm over here. Now, don't do this again!" And she hung up the phone.
My first thought was "S***! I just blew it!" But after awhile, I started thinking about what transpired and a lot of stuff didn't make sense. Namely, that she had given me the phone number to Ard's house to call her before. And if she didn't want to talk on the phone at Ard's house, why did she pick up the phone? I sure didn't want the relationship to end this quickly, but if she was going to act this way because I made a phone call that I ASSUMED I was permitted to make, maybe we didn't need to be in a relationship. I decided to not call her again and see if I would hear from her.
Believe it or not, she actually called me. I was working at the Hillcrest Cinemas when we had about five different crises happening at once. I had gone up to the Manager's office to get some cash. While I was there, the phone rang. I picked it up and it was Priz. "Hey, Fayd! How's it going?" I was just a little too frazzled at the time. I told her I had some stuff to take care of, then I would get back on the phone. It took me 10 minutes to put out all the fires and I was able to return to the Manager's office and talk to her. Priz was still on the line. "Hey, Fayd! I was wondering if you wanted to go out again." "Uh, sure, I'd like to do that. I'm going to the Ken Cinema Wednesday night to see 'Tommy" and 'Quadrophenia' if you want to do that." "Yeah, we can do that. What time do you want me to pick you up?" "Come by about 6:00." "Okay, I'll be there. Oh, and we'll also have to make plans for your birthday!"
Okay, so things were looking up in this relationship. She appeared to have forgiven me for "invading her privacy." But I wish I had known what was going to happen next. If I hadn't been so desperate to have a girlfriend, I would have told her, "You're not supposed to call me at work!" and hung up the phone. That would have been better than what eventually happened.
Wednesday night rolled around. 6pm came and went. I got tired of waiting after 15 minutes. I got in the car and drove over to Ard's house. Priz was outside. From my car, I yelled, "Priz!" She turned around. "Did you forget something?" "Were we supposed to go out tonight?" "Yes." "No, I never confirmed that!" (Yes, you did!) She came up to car. "I guess we need to talk. I just get the idea that you're probably more interested in dating other women." "No, I'm not." "Well, this just isn't working out. So, y'know, good luck with whatever."
I left even more bewildered than after I called her at Ard's house. (I'm actually surprised she didn't give me a dressing down for driving by.) What was she talking about? What gave her the impression I would rather see other women? I kind of came to the conclusion that maybe she didn't like that we weren't on the fast track to a a sexual relationship. But if she had a problem with that, she could have just told me. I really liked her, but I hadn't gotten to the point that I thought she would be the person I would lose my virginity to. Maybe that's what she meant. I would actually never find out.
Afterwards, I realized that, in this relationship, I felt like the girl. I mean, she was the one who made the moves. She was always driving me around. She was controlling the direction of the relationship. If I hadn't been the one who paid for everything, I would have been completely emasculated by her. It was a good thing this didn't last long. As it turns out, she would be the only girlfriend I had to whom I never said "I love you." She sure the heck didn't say it to me.
But just because the relationship came to an end, my contact with her didn't. More on that tomorrow.
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