Lostop #3: Wiz

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In December of 1997, I had booked a show at one of the larger venues in San Diego, Brick by Brick. They had a monthly new artist showcase and they had asked me if I wanted to take part. I agreed and set about trying to set up an actual band to perform with me. I was able to talk Zid into singing lead vocal on most of the songs (because I offered to pay her $50 for the gig). I also recruited Fraz to play rhythm guitar and Perd to play bass.

But I couldn't get everyone together for regular rehearsals. Fraz and Perd eventually decided they didn't want to do it, but Zid was still game. I gave the lyrics and piano tracks for the songs I wanted her to perform. The only caveat she gave me was that she wasn't going to be able to memorize the lyrics in time for the performance. She would have to be holding up the pieces of paper while she performed.

The best time for us to get together and practice was when she was rehearsing for a church Christmas musical. It was a church she didn't belong to, but she knew the music director and he asked her to sing a few solos. Since the full choir was at these rehearsals, she wasn't needed all the time and we could practice between her sessions in a separate room that had a piano.

The first time we rehearsed at the church, a friend of hers hung out in the room with us. Her name was Wiz. She was 20 years old, a little overweight, but very cute. She had light brown hair and cerebral palsy. The condition mostly affected her legs. She was able to stand and walk, but it was a bit of a challenge for her.

During the times that night that Zid was required to rehearse the musical, Wiz and I hung out and talked a bit. After rehearsal was done, I walked with Wiz out to her car. I guess she could tell that I liked her, because she gave me her phone number and asked me to call her. I was rather stunned by this, but was thrilled at the prospect of not having to figure out if someone liked me enough for me to approach her and try to coax that out of her.

I called her up a few days later. She sounded excited to hear from me. We talked for awhile and planned to see each other again at the next church rehearsal. At the rehearsal, I was waiting for Zid to finish her part in the musical so we could go back and rehearse. Wiz wasn't there at first, but she came in later. She appeared to have been crying. However, she didn't tell either me or Zid what was going on. But Wiz and I did talk for a little bit and made tentative plans to do something together the next weekend. I just had to call her to set it up.

I called her that Saturday and we decided to go out to a coffeehouse in San Diego. I came over to her house and met her parents. They seemed like nice people, but I don't know how they felt about my long hair.

We ordered drinks and talked for awhile. I told her a little about my recent past and she told me hers. She said she had previously been promiscuous, but that was all behind her and she wasn't going to do that any more. I didn't have a problem with that. I wasn't looking to get into another heavy relationship right away. I hadn't set any expectations when I started talking to Wiz and just figured we'd both work on getting off to a good start.

Then she asked me how old I was. I told her I was 33, which was 13 years older than her. I asked her if that bothered her and she said no. I didn't notice any change in attitude on her part, so I thought everything was okay. I took her back home and said we'd see each other again.

She didn't show up at the church for the next rehearsal Zid and I had. I called her the next weekend. She told me she was in the middle of watching a Lifetime movie. I tried to have a conversation, but she said, "Hey, I'm really into this movie. Can we talk later?" I said sure and we got off the phone.

I had to think about this for a minute. We're just barely getting started and she's brushing me off for a TV-movie? I mean, she could have just grabbed a VHS tape, stuck it in the VCR and started recording. The fact that she didn't do this or even try to turn off the TV bothered me. I came to the conclusion that the age thing probably bothered her more than she wanted to admit. After all, I was likely closer to her parents' age than to hers.

However, I did need to consider that there were red flags, including the promiscuity. I decided to take the hint and never call her again. And that's just what I did. She never tried to call me again, either. And she didn't show up at church for the next rehearsal. Later, Zid asked about what happened between me and Wiz. I told her the story and she agreed that there may have been a problem with my age, but she didn't know for sure because she wasn't very good friends with Wiz.

I don't know where Wiz is now. She has a rather common name. I came across numerous obituaries with that name in San Diego, but none of them appeared to be her. I hope she's not dead. Chances are she got married and had some kids.

In the end, I'm thankful that we didn't get full on into a relationship. As much as she was trying to avoid drama, I'm certain it would have found its way toward us and I would have had another girlfriend that I would have posted at least 50 articles about.

As for the show at Brick by Brick, it didn't go over that well. I had paid $75 to rent an electronic piano for the performance, so it SOUNDED great. Zid and I had rehearsed the songs well enough, but didn't know what to do between songs, so we had a lot of patter on stage. Abed was the only person who came and paid to see us play, so it didn't really matter how much we pattered. (I should add that Fraz was there and had helped me set up the keyboard, so I didn't make her pay.) No one was really there to see us. Abed did say that on the songs that Zid sang on, I was playing the keyboard much better than when I was singing. That made a lot of sense.

I never got another gig like that again. However, I did eventually get another girlfriend, but that's another story further off in the future.