After getting laid off from Aradiant, I found myself in a position I hadn't been in for more than eight years: Having to find a job from scratch. A lot had changed since the last time I was unemployed. The Internet was now available for assisting me in my job search. I was optimistic that I would be able to find a position with comparable pay in very little time.
One of the things recommended to me was to post my resume on Monster.com. In addition to there being a number of job listings, companies could see my resume and contact me to come in to interview for a position I may be qualified for. The day after I uploaded my resume, I received an e-mail from a company called Primerica to consider applying for them. I didn't really know much about the company, but they featured the umbrella logo that was used by the Travelers Group. I'd heard of them and figured this was a reputable company.
I visited their website and viewed the job description. They were looking for people to become financial planners and sell life insurance policies. It appeared that employees would be sent to the homes of people who contacted Primerica for financial solutions. They would do some kind of analysis on their earnings, and if there was enough funding left over, the employees would try to talk the clients into purchasing life insurance or some other product. I didn't want to do this. I then looked at the fine print of the job description. It said that employees would be required to pay $200 to go through some kind of insurance licensing and certification. I definitely knew that I didn't want to do this.
However, I saw this as an opportunity to brush up on my interviewing skills. I called them up. The person I talked to asked if I had seen everything about the requirements for the position online. I assumed he meant the part that I would have to shell out money in order to work there. I said I had. We arranged a date and time for an interview.
I dressed up like I meant it. I went down to the office. I could see they had a room set up for a presentation for about 20 people. However, I was the only one there. I wasn't sure if they were going to do an interview or a full presentation with a lot of other people. A man came out and asked me to come into the office. I went in and the interview started. It was a standard interview. I don't remember anything special about it. I know I wasn't trying too hard to impress him, but I did my best to answer his questions to his satisfaction. He told me that if they were interested, they would call me back.
A couple of days later, he called me back to see if I wanted to come and take part in a seminar they were offering. This seemed to be what the presentation room was for. I didn't want to waste any more of their time, so I told him I wasn't interested.
(A few months later, at a job I did wind up at, I assisted a customer. Immediately afterward, she gave me her business card and she said she could offer me a free financial planning session. It was a Primerica card. I knew what was up with that. It even looked like they had trouble getting leads, so the employees were required to hit the streets to drum up business.)
In addition to the interview, I attempted to apply for a lot of jobs that were listed on the website. There were many positions that I appeared to be qualified for and it was very convenient to apply for them, but no one ever called me up for an interview. I came to the conclusion that every job that got posted probably got THOUSANDS of applications, even from people far away from the locations of the jobs. They probably just looked at the first 50 - 100 applications that came in and pooled their interviews from those. The others just weren't looked at. (And keep in mind that there were a lot of people who lost their jobs in the aftermath of 9/11. There was A LOT of competition.) I would imagine you had to get your application in SECONDS after a job was posted in order to be considered.
Under these circumstances, I came to the realization that I was not going to find a job through the Internet. I was going to have to apply in person if I wanted to get a job. Since I really just needed something to get me through the end of the year so I could attempt to get Unemployment benefits in January of 2002, I decided to apply at retail establishments.
I started at Kmart. There was one just a couple of miles from my house and was within decent walking distance in the event that my car broke down. Since I had worked for Kmart before in Artesia, I thought there was a strong possibility they would hire me for seasonal work. But they never called me back, even though the application asked if I'd ever worked for Kmart and I clearly stated I had.
Next, I went to Toys R Us. It wasn't that far away from my house, but I would definitely have to use some form of transportation to get there. I applied and took their test that tried to figure out if I was a child molester. I was called back for an interview a few days later. The person who interviewed me said he liked that I'd had inventory experience because that meant I could help with their audit prep, which would allow me to continue working there a little past the Christmas shopping season.
But I had to do a little role play. He asked me to go out onto the floor for about 15 minutes, pick a toy and then try to sell him the toy. I didn't like where this was heading. I looked around and found a Harry Potter toy. (The first movie was about to come out.) It featured Harry riding a broom and trying to catch a Snitch. I figured I could talk about the excitement surrounding the movie as a pitch for the toy.
The age range for the toy was 11 - 15. When the role play started, I asked the interview if his child was a fan of Harry Potter. He said yes. I then asked how old the child was. "10." "D'oh!" (Yes, I actually said that out loud.) Because this was the toy I chose, I had to stick with it. I asked if maybe the child might be considered a little advanced for his age. He said yes, and I continued my pitch. I flashed back to my roleplaying in the high school DECA competition after he didn't give me a definite "yes" to buying the toy. He said he'd call me if they wanted me to work for them. I never did get that call.
However, I did get hired at the next place I applied. I'll go more into detail about that tomorrow.
Monday, January 7, 2019
Friday, January 4, 2019
Internet Tease #3: Argz
In another effort to find a girlfriend on AOL, I took another dip in the "Big & Beautiful" pool. I came across Argz, who lived in the Los Angeles area. She was 28 years old and Hispanic. She had 13 brothers and sisters. She was still living at home.
(I should point out that even though I was trying to meet an Asian woman on-line, I wasn't having much luck in that department. All of the chat rooms that featured Asian women wanting to meet white men proved to be filled with women who had no interest in IM'ing or even making any effort to get to know any men outside of what was getting posted in the chats. AND since Asian women don't tend to be very overweight, finding them in the Big & Beautiful rooms was nigh impossible!)
Argz was also pregnant. The man who was the father wasn't interested in making a commitment to her. She still communicated with him, but he didn't appear to want to be a permanent part of her life.
We continued to chat and e-mail each other. I sent her my picture and she sent me hers. She was overweight, but she was still rather attractive. I got brave with her and asked her if she wanted to talk on the phone. She agreed and gave me her number. I called her and we had a nice conversation. Toward the end, she told me that she really liked my voice. She was afraid I was going to sound kinda of "wimpy," but she was impressed with the way I talked.
She had a baby girl that weighed eight pounds. It was a rough delivery as they had to induce labor. She said shortly after she and the baby were taken to their hospital room, the father came by to see them at the hospital. They talked about having them move in with him. However, she didn't think it was going to happen because they were both hard-headed. Also, he wanted them to move out to Oxnard, which she thought was too far away. She sent me a couple of photos of the newborn.
We talked on the phone a couple more times and we decided to meet. The plan was that I would drive up to her house and just hang out with her and the baby there. It was a Sunday morning. Right before I was ready to leave, she called me and said that the baby had been up all night and she wasn't in a good mood for me to come up. I was disappointed, but knew I couldn't force the issue. I figured we'd find another day that we could meet.
A few weeks later, I called her. She said that she and the father decided to move in together, so it wasn't a good idea for us to talk to each other anymore. Yeah, I wasn't going to get in the way of that. We said our goodbyes and that was it.
I don't remember her last name, so I don't know where she's at now. But that baby girl is 17 years old now.
(I should point out that even though I was trying to meet an Asian woman on-line, I wasn't having much luck in that department. All of the chat rooms that featured Asian women wanting to meet white men proved to be filled with women who had no interest in IM'ing or even making any effort to get to know any men outside of what was getting posted in the chats. AND since Asian women don't tend to be very overweight, finding them in the Big & Beautiful rooms was nigh impossible!)
Argz was also pregnant. The man who was the father wasn't interested in making a commitment to her. She still communicated with him, but he didn't appear to want to be a permanent part of her life.
We continued to chat and e-mail each other. I sent her my picture and she sent me hers. She was overweight, but she was still rather attractive. I got brave with her and asked her if she wanted to talk on the phone. She agreed and gave me her number. I called her and we had a nice conversation. Toward the end, she told me that she really liked my voice. She was afraid I was going to sound kinda of "wimpy," but she was impressed with the way I talked.
She had a baby girl that weighed eight pounds. It was a rough delivery as they had to induce labor. She said shortly after she and the baby were taken to their hospital room, the father came by to see them at the hospital. They talked about having them move in with him. However, she didn't think it was going to happen because they were both hard-headed. Also, he wanted them to move out to Oxnard, which she thought was too far away. She sent me a couple of photos of the newborn.
We talked on the phone a couple more times and we decided to meet. The plan was that I would drive up to her house and just hang out with her and the baby there. It was a Sunday morning. Right before I was ready to leave, she called me and said that the baby had been up all night and she wasn't in a good mood for me to come up. I was disappointed, but knew I couldn't force the issue. I figured we'd find another day that we could meet.
A few weeks later, I called her. She said that she and the father decided to move in together, so it wasn't a good idea for us to talk to each other anymore. Yeah, I wasn't going to get in the way of that. We said our goodbyes and that was it.
I don't remember her last name, so I don't know where she's at now. But that baby girl is 17 years old now.
Thursday, January 3, 2019
Internet Tease #2: Norz
After being romantically involved with a woman who weighed more than 300 pounds, I knew I no longer found overweight women unattractive. In my efforts to try to meet women on the Internet, I decided to specifically seek out overweight women because I knew I had a better chance with them. (Even though my overall experience with Jolz was not all that positive.)
I went into an AOL chat room called "Big & Beautiful." I found a woman who had the word "Smart" in her username. I asked her if she was really smart. She said she had a Ph.D. Yep, I'd call that smart.
Her name was Norz and she worked at the University of Washington in Seattle. This was where she got her Ph.D. in Political Science. She had recently achieved that degree and was working as an Academic Counselor. She also taught some classes. I was afraid she was going to think she was too smart for me, but she continued chatting.
She was 32 years old and Hispanic. She lived by herself. She grew up in Bakersfield and her father still lived there on a farm. She described herself as a Christian. She shared a photograph with me. She looked cute, but it featured her with a child who had been partially cropped out of the photo. She said that if she shared the photo with a guy she didn't really like, she would say that was one of her five children.
We had many wonderful IM chats on AOL. One night, I had started watching the pilot episode of "Alias." I went over to the computer to see if anything was happening on AOL. Norz was on, so we started chatting. I still "Alias" on in the background and at one point, I could hear a song by Peter Gabriel. All of a sudden, Norz asked if I liked Peter Gabriel. I wrote, "You must be watching 'Alias.'" I thought that was interesting.
A little later on, I wrote that I was about to go on a vacation in a few weeks. I was going to go to Phoenix to see my Mom, to Artesia to see my Dad, then to Denver to catch up with my old friends. She wrote, "You mean I won't get to chat with you then?" Suddenly, I realized that she probably really liked me. I had to ask, "Do you want to talk on the phone?" She said, "Sure!" I gave her my phone number and she called me.
I was surprised by the soft sound of her voice coming through the phone. It was very soothing to listen to. She told me that she was frequently complimented on her voice and that a few guys had asked her out without know what she looked like. But they were disappointed when they met her face to face.
Late one night, my phone rang. She just wanted to talk to me. I thought this was cool. I was usually the one who had to reach out to the woman. This was a pleasant turnaround. I was beginning to think this was going to lead somewhere.
About a week before my vacation, I had a proposition. I told her that I hadn't told anybody in Denver yet that I was coming out there. I thought I could come up to Seattle instead to meet her. She said she would have to think about it. The next day, she told me she wasn't ready to meet now, but she would let me know when she was. I accepted that and continued with my plans.
I drove to Phoenix and spent time with Mom and Dend. At one point, I left so I could call Norz. We talked for about an hour. I also called her from Dad's house when I went to see him and Gred. We really seemed to enjoy our time on the phone and online. At the time, she thought we was going to come to Bakersfield for Thanksgiving and there was a chance we would be able to meet then. However, her father and brother decided to come up to Seattle to see her instead, so that didn't happen.
And then I lost my job. When I told Norz about it, I suggested again that this was a good time for me to try to come meet her in Seattle, since I had a good sum of money from my severance package. Again, she declined. I was really starting to get irritated.
But it all came down at Thanksgiving. She didn't call, e-mail or connect with me on AOL once. I shot off a e-mail that indicated I was rather disappointed that she was ignoring me. I felt like she was doing that because she didn't want her family to know anything about me because I didn't have a job and it would appear like I was trying to leech off of her.
She finally e-mailed me back and told me her father had to be taken to the hospital while he was in Seattle. He recovered, but she didn't have any time to communicate to me. I felt stupid for that. She decided she didn't want to pursue any kind of a relationship with me and shut me out. I felt even more stupid.
I tried to chat with her online a couple of times after that, but she always cut it off short. It was definitely over. I was very heartbroken over this. The bad part was that I had become rather fond of talking to someone with a similar level of intellect and knew it was going to be hard to find someone else who could do that AND like me.
I managed to keep track of her. About a year later, she became an Assistant Professor a CSU-Chico. We were both living in the same state for about four years. Then, she moved back to UW and worked her way up through the administration there. She appears to still be there, but I haven't found any updates for the last couple of years. These were easy to find because she posted her resume online in 2015. I also found some photos. She still looks about the same as when she shared photos of herself. It doesn't look like she ever got married or had kids.
But that's not my fault.
I went into an AOL chat room called "Big & Beautiful." I found a woman who had the word "Smart" in her username. I asked her if she was really smart. She said she had a Ph.D. Yep, I'd call that smart.
Her name was Norz and she worked at the University of Washington in Seattle. This was where she got her Ph.D. in Political Science. She had recently achieved that degree and was working as an Academic Counselor. She also taught some classes. I was afraid she was going to think she was too smart for me, but she continued chatting.
She was 32 years old and Hispanic. She lived by herself. She grew up in Bakersfield and her father still lived there on a farm. She described herself as a Christian. She shared a photograph with me. She looked cute, but it featured her with a child who had been partially cropped out of the photo. She said that if she shared the photo with a guy she didn't really like, she would say that was one of her five children.
We had many wonderful IM chats on AOL. One night, I had started watching the pilot episode of "Alias." I went over to the computer to see if anything was happening on AOL. Norz was on, so we started chatting. I still "Alias" on in the background and at one point, I could hear a song by Peter Gabriel. All of a sudden, Norz asked if I liked Peter Gabriel. I wrote, "You must be watching 'Alias.'" I thought that was interesting.
A little later on, I wrote that I was about to go on a vacation in a few weeks. I was going to go to Phoenix to see my Mom, to Artesia to see my Dad, then to Denver to catch up with my old friends. She wrote, "You mean I won't get to chat with you then?" Suddenly, I realized that she probably really liked me. I had to ask, "Do you want to talk on the phone?" She said, "Sure!" I gave her my phone number and she called me.
I was surprised by the soft sound of her voice coming through the phone. It was very soothing to listen to. She told me that she was frequently complimented on her voice and that a few guys had asked her out without know what she looked like. But they were disappointed when they met her face to face.
Late one night, my phone rang. She just wanted to talk to me. I thought this was cool. I was usually the one who had to reach out to the woman. This was a pleasant turnaround. I was beginning to think this was going to lead somewhere.
About a week before my vacation, I had a proposition. I told her that I hadn't told anybody in Denver yet that I was coming out there. I thought I could come up to Seattle instead to meet her. She said she would have to think about it. The next day, she told me she wasn't ready to meet now, but she would let me know when she was. I accepted that and continued with my plans.
I drove to Phoenix and spent time with Mom and Dend. At one point, I left so I could call Norz. We talked for about an hour. I also called her from Dad's house when I went to see him and Gred. We really seemed to enjoy our time on the phone and online. At the time, she thought we was going to come to Bakersfield for Thanksgiving and there was a chance we would be able to meet then. However, her father and brother decided to come up to Seattle to see her instead, so that didn't happen.
And then I lost my job. When I told Norz about it, I suggested again that this was a good time for me to try to come meet her in Seattle, since I had a good sum of money from my severance package. Again, she declined. I was really starting to get irritated.
But it all came down at Thanksgiving. She didn't call, e-mail or connect with me on AOL once. I shot off a e-mail that indicated I was rather disappointed that she was ignoring me. I felt like she was doing that because she didn't want her family to know anything about me because I didn't have a job and it would appear like I was trying to leech off of her.
She finally e-mailed me back and told me her father had to be taken to the hospital while he was in Seattle. He recovered, but she didn't have any time to communicate to me. I felt stupid for that. She decided she didn't want to pursue any kind of a relationship with me and shut me out. I felt even more stupid.
I tried to chat with her online a couple of times after that, but she always cut it off short. It was definitely over. I was very heartbroken over this. The bad part was that I had become rather fond of talking to someone with a similar level of intellect and knew it was going to be hard to find someone else who could do that AND like me.
I managed to keep track of her. About a year later, she became an Assistant Professor a CSU-Chico. We were both living in the same state for about four years. Then, she moved back to UW and worked her way up through the administration there. She appears to still be there, but I haven't found any updates for the last couple of years. These were easy to find because she posted her resume online in 2015. I also found some photos. She still looks about the same as when she shared photos of herself. It doesn't look like she ever got married or had kids.
But that's not my fault.
Wednesday, January 2, 2019
Internet Tease #1: Jarz
After I was able to connect to the Internet toward the end of 2000, I decided to use it for its intended purpose: Meeting women.
Or, that was the plan anyway. As it turned out, I didn't get to meet many women over the Internet. My batting average was far worse than when I was doing personal ads. Up to this point, I'd heard all kinds of stories about people meeting each other on the Internet. And sometimes, they left their spouses for what were supposed to be temporary flings. I didn't want to break up a marriage, but it sounded a lot easier than it turned out to be.
The biggest problem was locating women who lived nearby me. I was up to meeting women who lived in Southern California and willing to drive up about three hours, but even those opportunities were few and far between. I couldn't catch a break.
I had no intention of getting on a plane to meet someone halfway across the country because I certainly didn't have enough money for that. I barely had enough money to afford a trip in which I could fly out to Missouri to see my Mom and Loyd earlier in 2001. I couldn't imagine a situation in which I was willing to shell out money for an uncertain meeting with someone I barely knew in a place I wasn't familiar with.
Jarz was one of the first women I IM'd on AOL. We were in some chat room together and I looked at her profile. She was 28 years old and was a single mother. She lived in Michigan. What I really remember is that she had an amazing profile photo. (I wasn't brave enough to put my photo on my profile.) She was one of the few people I would describe as "sassy." She was very attractive, but I didn't feel like she was out of my league. We started chatting with each other.
One thing I should point out about my AOL experience is my chat method. I was very hard-wired to type correct grammar, punctuation and capitalization. I knew I was a pretty fast typist and didn't view having full sentences as an obstruction to trying to get a message across. About 30 minutes into our chat, she mentioned that she was trying hard to correctly type everything. I looked back at the beginning of our chat and saw that she started out with all lowercase letters and no punctuation, but that had changed midway through. I wrote, "Oh, you're trying to impress me!"
After that, we would occasionally find each other online and chat. After awhile, I got brave and asked if we could talk on the phone. She said we could, but she wouldn't give me her home number. I would have to call her at her job at a particular time of day. She worked at a Big Lots! I'd never heard of it before. But I did call her up. We talked for a few minutes before she had to start work.
She told me about how she had met someone else on AOL a year earlier and they arranged to fly do a destination in the middle to meet. But she didn't go into detail about what happened after that. I imagine it just didn't work out. I already knew I wasn't going to go that far to meet her, but it was nice to connect over the phone.
Once I went to a street fair in North Park and hung out with Tez and a couple of other guys. She needed to buy something, so we went inside a Pic 'n' Save store. (I always thought it sounded like something you weren't supposed to do with your nose.) Inside, I noticed that their bags said "Pic 'n' Save/Big Lots!" NOW I GET IT! They were both part of the same chain.
I talked to her at work a couple more times. Then, she told me she'd met someone and I didn't need to call her any more, so I never did. I never knew Jarz' last name, so I have no way of finding out what happened to her.
But I was fine with not talking to her anymore. As you'll find out, I had a couple of other women online I was making efforts to meet.
Or, that was the plan anyway. As it turned out, I didn't get to meet many women over the Internet. My batting average was far worse than when I was doing personal ads. Up to this point, I'd heard all kinds of stories about people meeting each other on the Internet. And sometimes, they left their spouses for what were supposed to be temporary flings. I didn't want to break up a marriage, but it sounded a lot easier than it turned out to be.
The biggest problem was locating women who lived nearby me. I was up to meeting women who lived in Southern California and willing to drive up about three hours, but even those opportunities were few and far between. I couldn't catch a break.
I had no intention of getting on a plane to meet someone halfway across the country because I certainly didn't have enough money for that. I barely had enough money to afford a trip in which I could fly out to Missouri to see my Mom and Loyd earlier in 2001. I couldn't imagine a situation in which I was willing to shell out money for an uncertain meeting with someone I barely knew in a place I wasn't familiar with.
Jarz was one of the first women I IM'd on AOL. We were in some chat room together and I looked at her profile. She was 28 years old and was a single mother. She lived in Michigan. What I really remember is that she had an amazing profile photo. (I wasn't brave enough to put my photo on my profile.) She was one of the few people I would describe as "sassy." She was very attractive, but I didn't feel like she was out of my league. We started chatting with each other.
One thing I should point out about my AOL experience is my chat method. I was very hard-wired to type correct grammar, punctuation and capitalization. I knew I was a pretty fast typist and didn't view having full sentences as an obstruction to trying to get a message across. About 30 minutes into our chat, she mentioned that she was trying hard to correctly type everything. I looked back at the beginning of our chat and saw that she started out with all lowercase letters and no punctuation, but that had changed midway through. I wrote, "Oh, you're trying to impress me!"
After that, we would occasionally find each other online and chat. After awhile, I got brave and asked if we could talk on the phone. She said we could, but she wouldn't give me her home number. I would have to call her at her job at a particular time of day. She worked at a Big Lots! I'd never heard of it before. But I did call her up. We talked for a few minutes before she had to start work.
She told me about how she had met someone else on AOL a year earlier and they arranged to fly do a destination in the middle to meet. But she didn't go into detail about what happened after that. I imagine it just didn't work out. I already knew I wasn't going to go that far to meet her, but it was nice to connect over the phone.
Once I went to a street fair in North Park and hung out with Tez and a couple of other guys. She needed to buy something, so we went inside a Pic 'n' Save store. (I always thought it sounded like something you weren't supposed to do with your nose.) Inside, I noticed that their bags said "Pic 'n' Save/Big Lots!" NOW I GET IT! They were both part of the same chain.
I talked to her at work a couple more times. Then, she told me she'd met someone and I didn't need to call her any more, so I never did. I never knew Jarz' last name, so I have no way of finding out what happened to her.
But I was fine with not talking to her anymore. As you'll find out, I had a couple of other women online I was making efforts to meet.
Tuesday, January 1, 2019
Lostop #4: Verz
I would like to point out that this is the last Lostop that I will write about on this blog. (What's a Lostop? Click here!)
I first became aware of Verz when I went over to the Balboa building for NDC to interview for the LDA position. I went up to Camd's Supervisor station and I saw a woman with black hair talking to him. From the back, I thought it was Mitz and that she was also interviewing for the position. When Camd turned his attention away from the woman to look at me, she turned around and I could see it wasn't Mitz. She went and sat in her cubicle next to the Supervisor station. That was close. I considered Mitz strong competition. I didn't know anything about this woman, but it was apparent she wasn't applying for the same job I was.
The day I started working as an LDA, I was formally introduced to Verz. She was 20 years old and had large brown eyes. She was very beautiful and WAY out of my league. I didn't really talk that much with her. After a few days, I got to know a little bit more about her. One of the things that surprised me about working at the Supervisor station was how many of the employees would come up and chat with Camd and myself when they were supposed to be on the phones answering calls. When I was a dispatch agent, I never dreamed of wasting time like that. I was too busy concentrating on making my monthly bonuses. Hanging out at the Supervisor station would have literally cost me hundreds of dollars.
Camd especially seemed to enjoy when the younger female employees would do this. He never did or said anything inappropriate, but it was apparent that he was encouraging this behavior. Sure, I have to admit that I developed my crushes along the way, but his activities was even being noticed by some other members of the staff. I'd overheard the QA people making comments about how they could tell he wanted to start things up with certain agents, including Verz.
After a few months, Verz started talking to me more and more. One of the things I knew about her was that she had a boyfriend, but she couldn't tell her parents about him. The problem was that she was Indonesian and he was Japanese. Her grandfather had been tortured by the Japanese in WWII, so she was forbidden to have anything to do with anyone of Japanese ancestry. In addition, her previous boyfriend had also been Japanese, and she hadn't told her parents about him, either. I kind of wondered what excuse she gave her parents when she was going out on dates with them, but I never asked. He turned out to be a pretty big jerk (in the abusive sense), but she still stuck to him.
Verz then started creating "artwork" for me during her downtime. She made these little paper dolls that resembled her and the woman who had the cubicle next to her. When the other woman was promoted to QA, another woman took her location and Verz made a doll of her to give to me. I got the idea that Camd got a little jealous that I had received these gifts from her. But it made me wonder that if she didn't have that Japanese boyfriend, maybe she might have some kind of interest in me.
The day I got laid off, I got a little brave and asked for her e-mail address. She gladly gave it to me.
A couple of days later, I e-mailed her and was surprised to get a response the next day. She told me that morale was down at the call center and everyone was somewhat angry that the company president didn't express any kind of sympathy for those who had lost their jobs. She didn't think she was going to be there much longer and was going to start looking for another job.
So this was the beginning of a regular correspondence between the two of us. When I started writing this post, I thought that we had e-mailed each other back and forth just a few times. However, I discovered I had saved all her e-mails and we actually wrote each other once or twice a week for the next year. I do remember that I was trying to set up a situation in which we would be "dating." I never called it that, but I was definitely making the attempts when it looked like she was going to be leaving her boyfriend.
Here's what happened: I actually got to see Verz a few times after getting laid off because she and her mother would frequently come to where I worked. Her mother seemed to like me and smiled when she saw me. I tried to get Verz to go out with me "as friends." I was hoping we could do this on some kind of regular basis. I thought maybe she might enjoy the times she was with me and wouldn't enjoy the times that I wasn't around. And perhaps, we could go beyond being friends.
But anytime we made plans, something happened and we weren't able to go out, even if her mother might have approved of me. Later, I found out it was a pipe dream, because she later became involved with an Indonesian man, who actually treated her well. This was another boyfriend she didn't tell her parents about. She said that her parents didn't want her to date an Indonesian man. They wanted her to marry a rich white man. Well, that meant I had no chance, at least as far as her parents were concerned. However, she was going to have to tell them about the new boyfriend because she was pregnant and wasn't going to be able to hide it much longer.
I stopped writing her so much after that. (But mainly because I became involved with someone else.) I did keep in touch a couple more times. She had a little girl, but hadn't married the father. She did later get married to him and they had another girl. She didn't say anything about the drama involving her parents, but they appeared to accept what was going on.
We're currently connected on LinkedIn, but we haven't communicated with each other. She works in the healthcare industry. To this day, I wonder if she's aware that I had romantic designs on her or if she thought I was just trying to be her friend. Either way, it doesn't matter. She's still out of my league.
I first became aware of Verz when I went over to the Balboa building for NDC to interview for the LDA position. I went up to Camd's Supervisor station and I saw a woman with black hair talking to him. From the back, I thought it was Mitz and that she was also interviewing for the position. When Camd turned his attention away from the woman to look at me, she turned around and I could see it wasn't Mitz. She went and sat in her cubicle next to the Supervisor station. That was close. I considered Mitz strong competition. I didn't know anything about this woman, but it was apparent she wasn't applying for the same job I was.
The day I started working as an LDA, I was formally introduced to Verz. She was 20 years old and had large brown eyes. She was very beautiful and WAY out of my league. I didn't really talk that much with her. After a few days, I got to know a little bit more about her. One of the things that surprised me about working at the Supervisor station was how many of the employees would come up and chat with Camd and myself when they were supposed to be on the phones answering calls. When I was a dispatch agent, I never dreamed of wasting time like that. I was too busy concentrating on making my monthly bonuses. Hanging out at the Supervisor station would have literally cost me hundreds of dollars.
Camd especially seemed to enjoy when the younger female employees would do this. He never did or said anything inappropriate, but it was apparent that he was encouraging this behavior. Sure, I have to admit that I developed my crushes along the way, but his activities was even being noticed by some other members of the staff. I'd overheard the QA people making comments about how they could tell he wanted to start things up with certain agents, including Verz.
After a few months, Verz started talking to me more and more. One of the things I knew about her was that she had a boyfriend, but she couldn't tell her parents about him. The problem was that she was Indonesian and he was Japanese. Her grandfather had been tortured by the Japanese in WWII, so she was forbidden to have anything to do with anyone of Japanese ancestry. In addition, her previous boyfriend had also been Japanese, and she hadn't told her parents about him, either. I kind of wondered what excuse she gave her parents when she was going out on dates with them, but I never asked. He turned out to be a pretty big jerk (in the abusive sense), but she still stuck to him.
Verz then started creating "artwork" for me during her downtime. She made these little paper dolls that resembled her and the woman who had the cubicle next to her. When the other woman was promoted to QA, another woman took her location and Verz made a doll of her to give to me. I got the idea that Camd got a little jealous that I had received these gifts from her. But it made me wonder that if she didn't have that Japanese boyfriend, maybe she might have some kind of interest in me.
The day I got laid off, I got a little brave and asked for her e-mail address. She gladly gave it to me.
A couple of days later, I e-mailed her and was surprised to get a response the next day. She told me that morale was down at the call center and everyone was somewhat angry that the company president didn't express any kind of sympathy for those who had lost their jobs. She didn't think she was going to be there much longer and was going to start looking for another job.
So this was the beginning of a regular correspondence between the two of us. When I started writing this post, I thought that we had e-mailed each other back and forth just a few times. However, I discovered I had saved all her e-mails and we actually wrote each other once or twice a week for the next year. I do remember that I was trying to set up a situation in which we would be "dating." I never called it that, but I was definitely making the attempts when it looked like she was going to be leaving her boyfriend.
Here's what happened: I actually got to see Verz a few times after getting laid off because she and her mother would frequently come to where I worked. Her mother seemed to like me and smiled when she saw me. I tried to get Verz to go out with me "as friends." I was hoping we could do this on some kind of regular basis. I thought maybe she might enjoy the times she was with me and wouldn't enjoy the times that I wasn't around. And perhaps, we could go beyond being friends.
But anytime we made plans, something happened and we weren't able to go out, even if her mother might have approved of me. Later, I found out it was a pipe dream, because she later became involved with an Indonesian man, who actually treated her well. This was another boyfriend she didn't tell her parents about. She said that her parents didn't want her to date an Indonesian man. They wanted her to marry a rich white man. Well, that meant I had no chance, at least as far as her parents were concerned. However, she was going to have to tell them about the new boyfriend because she was pregnant and wasn't going to be able to hide it much longer.
I stopped writing her so much after that. (But mainly because I became involved with someone else.) I did keep in touch a couple more times. She had a little girl, but hadn't married the father. She did later get married to him and they had another girl. She didn't say anything about the drama involving her parents, but they appeared to accept what was going on.
We're currently connected on LinkedIn, but we haven't communicated with each other. She works in the healthcare industry. To this day, I wonder if she's aware that I had romantic designs on her or if she thought I was just trying to be her friend. Either way, it doesn't matter. She's still out of my league.
Monday, December 31, 2018
No more book in this face
I've posted before about how I don't do New Year's Resolutions. I've decided to make an exception this year. I need to get rid of a monkey that's been on my back for the last nine years: Facebook.
I should point this out that I am not doing it as part of the "Quit Facebook" movement. The truth of the matter is that I'm not actually quitting Facebook. And concerns about privacy didn't really impact me because I didn't use my real name.
In 2010, I had no desire to get involved with social networks. I had completely avoided MySpace and planned to do the same with Facebook and Twitter when they started building up steam. I had no interest in trying to connect with people from my past. And it seemed pointless to do with my co-workers. (I didn't have any real friends at the time.)
One day, Ms. Ogolon wanted to do some lurking on Facebook and asked me to set up an account. I thought this was odd because she'd actually had a MySpace profile so I don't know why she didn't want a presence on Facebook. Then she threatened to go ahead and set up a profile in my name. I told her that if she was going to do that, she should set up one under my San Diego music scene pseudonym and not my real name. This was something I hadn't thought about doing before. I was concerned about people I hated catching up with me, but they didn't know me as Fayd, so this solved everything.
Facebook was very exciting when I first got on. I was able to reach out to people I used to know in Denver and San Diego and reconnect with a lot of friends. I was finding people I hadn't had contact with in years. And having a Facebook account inspired me to go out, do things and post photos and statuses.
However, I wasn't so willing to reach out to my family members. My Mom knew about the account and sent me requests a couple of times, but I always denied her. A few years later, I wanted to get my friend count over 100, so I sent her and other family members a request. Mom thought someone had hacked into my account.
As you're all aware, Facebook has changed over the years. It evolved into a platform for people to promote their agendas. I have to admit to being guilty of that as well, but I tried hard to post and comment with honesty and integrity. I worked to read and research articles and memes that I shared, and would add comments to present my perspective. The problem was that there were too many other people who didn't want to do that and seemed to take great joy in contradicting and criticizing my comments.
I recall one time when I made a comment on an article shared by a friend. One of his friends replied to my comment, and went on this lengthy rant about race, which was not even a part of my comment. When I read it, it was obvious he was not calling me a racist, but any casual reader would have thought that was what he was trying to do. I got really upset about it, but I didn't know how to respond. There really is no proper response to being called a racist, or in this case, being implied as one. After thinking about it, I decided the best thing to do was to delete my comment and that would make his go away. The next day, he wrote a comment wondering what happened to his reply. I guess he had gone back to archive his writing because he was just so darn proud of what he had written and how he really slammed me. If I'd known he was going to get that mad about it, I would have taken a screenshot of his remarks before deleting them and then hold them for ransom by making him promise not to respond to any of my remarks ever again.
As we reach the end of our second year of the Trump administration, I see this aspect of Facebook is just going to get a lot worse. I'm tired of coming across it in my newsfeed every day. I don't like Trump and it would be nice if he was no longer President, but I am just so tired of having that drilled by everybody I know.
That's part of the problem. A bigger part is that it seems like my posts don't turn up in my friends' newsfeeds. You're all aware of the rumors about Facebook's algorithms that limit the posts you see to around 25 of your friends. Because I had only 100 friends, this didn't seem to be the case. I would see everyone's posts. But if you have more than 300, you're certainly not going to see everything. This means I get lost in the shuffle for most of my friends. I see my friends post stuff and they get 40 or 50 reactions and comments. Most of the time, I'll post something and it lands like a dull thud.
This is how the algorithms seem to work: If you have a friend and you frequently react and comment on their posts, they will continue to show up in your feed. I you have friends you don't do that for, then you don't see them as much. In order for others to see my posts, one of my friends needs to see it and react to it. When that happens, mutual friends will then see it and they might react, causing more people to see it. This is my theory of how it all works. And of course, you can always visit the profiles of all your friends and see all their posts individually without having to like them. When you do this, you'll likely find that the reason why you haven't seen a post from someone in years is because they haven't posted anything in years. They've given up on Facebook, like I'm doing now, without completely removing themselves.
(I actually have several "friends" who abandoned their profiles and started up new ones. They just didn't want to be deluged with friend requests from people they didn't really know.)
Another reason I want to stop using Facebook is because they've stopped notifying me when my friends are having birthdays. I always posted messages on my friends' timelines because Facebook let me know when to do that. If they're not telling me when the birthdays are, that means they're not telling my friends when it's my birthday.
Even worse is that I'm no longer getting friend requests. If I do get one, it's probably a catfisher. I actually had a few friends I suspected were catfishers, but they never even DM'd me. I mean, you must be a real loser if a catfisher doesn't even bother to follow up.
So, you're probably wondering why I don't just delete my account. Well, there are reasons. Number one is that I need an active account to do Video Chats with my Mom and her husband on Messenger. It's the only way she can do a video face to face with her grandson. I also have other friends that I will occasionally DM because I don't have their phone numbers.
And while I'm going to stop posting on my profile, I will continue to post on my Apink fan page "Apink Updates and My Loser Blog." It's nice because it tracks how many people have seen my posts and I actually get a lot more reactions than I do on my profile. If you enjoy seeing this blog show up in your Facebook feed, you're going to need to like this page because I will continue to share it there.
It should also be noted that I'm doing the same thing with my Instagram account. Those of you who follow me will no longer see me posting photos there. I have to keep that active because of who I follow.
However, you'll find me continuing to post on my Twitter account. But you're just going to get all the stuff I share on my Apink/Blog page and whatever I feel like replying to. It is not taking the place of Facebook. I will also keep my YouTube channel and will occasionally produce new content.
And if you know my real name, I also have a LinkedIn account. But I rarely post there and it's usually just work-related blog posts that I share.
And I'm not asking anyone to boycott Facebook or stop sharing on their profiles. If you're getting a positive experience out of it, you should continue. I've just decided it's no longer for me.
Friday, October 19, 2018
Aradiant: A Post-Mortem
Aradiant turned out to be one of those companies that could not fully recover in the aftermath of the dot-com bust. Their main advantage is that they had an infrastructure in place long before the boom happened, so they were better equipped to deal with a sudden loss in the majority of their business. But it wasn't enough to keep their head above water.
Prior to the round of layoffs that resulted in the termination of my employment, the company had sunk a lot of money into Research and Development to find new ways they could capitalize on untapped market potential. But they came up empty-handed. They determined that operator-based text messaging and the Servistream website service were the only two areas they had proficiency in and looked more to supporting that end of the business. One of the things they were able to get a commitment on was that Verizon was going to send all the business for their alpha-numeric pagers through Aradiant beginning in 2002. That amounted to 4,000 accounts.
In February of 2002, the San Diego Padres looked to Aradiant to handle their ticket sales. They wanted to dump out of TicketMaster. And there was a possibility that if it went well, the Chargers would follow suit. The Padres deal would help keep the center afloat seven months out of the year. I never knew if the Chargers decided to use the service, but that wouldn't have had a much impact as they only played around 10 or so games at home every year (including pre-season).
After that, me keeping up with the company got rather sketchy. I know that my former Supervisor Camd attempted to become a Supervisor for the Servistream side. However, they left an important requirement for the position off of the company posting and didn't tell him he didn't qualify until after they filled the job.
During this time, the popularity of phone to phone text messaging skyrocketed, eliminating the need for dispatch agents. About a year later, Camd got caught up in the next wave of layoffs. He had disciplinary action on his record, so even though he had the most seniority out of all the Supervisors, he was let go. We've managed to keep in touch over the last few years and are currently connected on LinkedIn. He's the Project Director of a non-profit organization in San Diego.
I know of one dispatch agent from my team who was still with the company as of 2005. I actually located that guy. He's now a desktop technician at Navy Federal Credit Union. I'm glad he was able to find stable work.
I know that there were plans to relocate operations in Tijuana. I recall going to the company website and it was very ambiguous about what service they provided. Reading stuff on-line, it looks like they went into providing tech support for various software companies. I don't know when they finally went out of business. However, the name is now being used by a manufacturer of coating and drying machinery in Pennsylvania.
But for a significant period of time, Aradiant/NDC was an important part of the electronic communications industry and provided jobs for so many people I knew in San Diego. It wasn't the best job for everybody, but it was great for me while I was there.
Prior to the round of layoffs that resulted in the termination of my employment, the company had sunk a lot of money into Research and Development to find new ways they could capitalize on untapped market potential. But they came up empty-handed. They determined that operator-based text messaging and the Servistream website service were the only two areas they had proficiency in and looked more to supporting that end of the business. One of the things they were able to get a commitment on was that Verizon was going to send all the business for their alpha-numeric pagers through Aradiant beginning in 2002. That amounted to 4,000 accounts.
In February of 2002, the San Diego Padres looked to Aradiant to handle their ticket sales. They wanted to dump out of TicketMaster. And there was a possibility that if it went well, the Chargers would follow suit. The Padres deal would help keep the center afloat seven months out of the year. I never knew if the Chargers decided to use the service, but that wouldn't have had a much impact as they only played around 10 or so games at home every year (including pre-season).
After that, me keeping up with the company got rather sketchy. I know that my former Supervisor Camd attempted to become a Supervisor for the Servistream side. However, they left an important requirement for the position off of the company posting and didn't tell him he didn't qualify until after they filled the job.
During this time, the popularity of phone to phone text messaging skyrocketed, eliminating the need for dispatch agents. About a year later, Camd got caught up in the next wave of layoffs. He had disciplinary action on his record, so even though he had the most seniority out of all the Supervisors, he was let go. We've managed to keep in touch over the last few years and are currently connected on LinkedIn. He's the Project Director of a non-profit organization in San Diego.
I know of one dispatch agent from my team who was still with the company as of 2005. I actually located that guy. He's now a desktop technician at Navy Federal Credit Union. I'm glad he was able to find stable work.
I know that there were plans to relocate operations in Tijuana. I recall going to the company website and it was very ambiguous about what service they provided. Reading stuff on-line, it looks like they went into providing tech support for various software companies. I don't know when they finally went out of business. However, the name is now being used by a manufacturer of coating and drying machinery in Pennsylvania.
But for a significant period of time, Aradiant/NDC was an important part of the electronic communications industry and provided jobs for so many people I knew in San Diego. It wasn't the best job for everybody, but it was great for me while I was there.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)