Many people might call me a loser. Even though I don't have many negative attributes, I just haven't been able to really get what I want out of life. This blog is a means of helping me figure out what things went wrong and how they went wrong, but will not offer any solutions on how I can fix my problems. There will be no epiphanies here. I am trying to take a light-hearted look at my life, despite the many dark areas.
Monday, December 21, 2020
A True Long-Distance Relationship
So, this was the first time I'd been involved in an actual long-distance relationship. I felt like it was definitely better than being in no relationship at all. I trusted Myz very much and never felt like I had to worry about what she was doing when I wasn't in San Jose. And I felt confident enough in the future of the relationship that I didn't need to hedge and see if I could find someone close to home.
We talked to each other on a daily basis. We also continued chatting on AOL whenever we were both on at the same time. If I was planning on doing something in the evening, I could let her know so we could talk before I left or we could just let it wait until the next day. I was pretty much free to come and go as I pleased while I was in San Diego.
I continued to drive up to see her every three to four weeks. I didn't mind that I had to be the one to always travel to see her. And it seemed like the more I drove up there, the shorter amount of time it took. It was like I was going at warp speed speed because I would literally zone out and the next thing I knew, I was there. (However, this didn't work when I drove back home to San Diego for some reason.) And somehow, even though I was working at Walmart, I always had money for gas, food and other forms of entertainment. It was like taking mini-vacations to the Bay Area all the time. (I didn't even go to Vegas that often!)
There was even one time that I decided to drive up to San Jose on the spur of the moment. I had hoped that she would enjoy me making a surprise, unplanned visit (even if I was going to show up at 2am). I actually wasn't going to tell her anything until I got there. (But if she was happy I did that, I knew I had a keeper!) However, she actually called me about an hour after I left San Diego and asked what I was up to. (I guess she could tell I was driving.) I thought for a moment and decided it would be best not to absolutely surprise her. I told her I was on the way up the San Jose. She was indeed excited, because she was actually going to ask me to come up! She really missed me!
I do have to admit that everything was not always perfect between us. Regardless of if I was in San Diego or San Jose, we would still have occasional disagreements. It was never anything so major that I felt like the relationship was in danger, but they were common mistakes that I made in previous relationships. We were always able to work through them and still continue to love each other.
I still had a dilemma: How were we going to reconcile the distance? At some point, one of us was going to have to move to be with the other for the relationship to prosper. I really didn't want to have to be the one to move. I liked living in San Diego. I had friends and after ten years, I finally felt comfortable there. But I also recalled the disasters that took place when I took my former girlfriends away from their homes in order to assimilate into my lifestyle. Those just didn't work out.
I knew I was going to have to be the one to move this time.
However, we're not going to get to that on this blog for awhile. The posts that follow will give a general outline of the things Myz and I went through during the next year of our courtship. It literally all became a blur (because of the warp-speed drive) so I won't be going into detail about every single trip. I will give a lot of general anecdotes about certain milestones we approached.
Some interesting things did happen, but for the most part, it will be drama-free. Unlike those other situations that involved moving someone to be with me.
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