Yeah, things between me and Marz got pretty bad in my last post, but I was still unwilling to let it end. I felt that she still cared for me and that she wanted to get back to the couple we were during that first week we met. I was able to recapture that mood every once in awhile, but those moments were always too fleeting and the times in-between just kept getting longer and longer. I hoped that with all the boyfriend problems she'd had in the past (which involved them all cheating on her) she would see what a good guy I was and how lucky she was to have me in her life. I now believe she just felt lucky she had a guy she could take complete advantage of. I didn't realize this until way too late.
During this time, she encountered my family. My brother Loyd had signed up for the Air Force. The day before he had to leave for boot camp, he came knocking on my front door. This was after one of the nights Marz spent with me by herself. She stayed in bed and I talked to Loyd in the living room. During our conversation, he used a derogatory term referring to Hispanics. I was afraid Marz was about to run out of the bedroom and strangle him. While we were talking, I non-verbally indicated that Marz was in the bedroom. Before he left, I let him peek in the bedroom. Marz had her face in the pillow, so he couldn't tell she was Hispanic. After he left, Marz told me she heard the entire conversation. I asked her about the derogatory term. She'd never heard that term before, so she didn't know to get mad about it.
A few weeks later, my great-grandmother passed away. My parents came up for the funeral. The graveyard was east of Clovis and the funeral procession drove by Marz' neighborhood. I was riding with my parents and I indicated the area where Marz lived, but they didn't get to meet her. A few weeks later, Dad came to get my car so he could fix it and leave his with me. However, I had let Marz and her friend borrow my car, so I didn't have it. I told Dad this. He remembered where I said Marz lived, drove over there and found my car. He knocked on the door to get the car keys and leave his Chevy Blazer with her. That was how he met her, but he didn't have much to say about her.
Marz agreed to come with me to meet my parents on Thanksgiving. However, the night before, she changed her mind about going. I called up Mom and she got very angry that I had canceled. It made her feel like I was being controlled by Marz (I guess I was) and that she was trying to keep me from my family (not true). Marz agreed to come with me to Artesia the next week to meet them, but she had to bring her friend along. The visit was pleasant and she seemed to get along with my parents okay.
I was able to get her to come home to spend Christmas with me, my parents and Loyd. That was a mistake. She was just horrible the whole time and Mom really didn't like her after that. On top of that, we needed her to help out with my parents 25th wedding anniversary party. She didn't like being a part of that. (Actually, she could have just stayed up in my room the whole. No one forced her.) Fortunately, my family never saw Marz again after that.
We did have one incredible evening together when she spent the night at my apartment. We started holding and kissing each other and I could feel the same magic in the air that existed when I first met her. She went so far as to take her shirt off under the blanket. (But I was on top of the blanket.) I actually thought there was a distinct possibility that we were going to make love. She laughed and said, "I feel so tempted right now." I said, "I feel it, too." I didn't want to proceed too quickly to the love-making because it had been a long time since we had been like this and I wanted to enjoy every moment before I lost my virginity. After a few minutes, the feeling subsided on her part. But it was the first time in so long I had gotten to hold her while we slept. I would never get to do that again or get that close to making love with her.
A few weekends went by without her staying the night. Finally, she said she would be able to sleep over. However, she had to wait until she was done with some sort of meeting she was required to go to that was connected to a shoplifting incident from before I met her. The meeting was held at the Air Force Base. She and her friends came over around 11pm. She said she may need to go out for another meeting. She had to call and find out. Certainly, this did not make sense and I called her on it. She told me if she didn't go, she would have to go to jail. I guess she really wanted to go to that meeting. I just stopped arguing at that point.
A few days later, Marz, a friend of hers, and I were driving through town during the day. All of a sudden, this white pickup drove past us and the driver honked the horn. I saw a blond guy with a military haircut and sunglasses waving at us. Her friend said, "Oh! It's Mord! He recognized the car!" I asked who Mord was. Her friend said it was some guy from the Air Force and wouldn't say anything more.
Not long after that, Marz said she had something to tell me. She said she had been seeing another guy, that it was Mord and she had been having sex with him. I didn't know what to say, but I know I was in denial at first. I didn't think anything was really going on. She told me that Mord got really upset when he saw her in the car with me. I asked her if she wanted to break up with me. She told me no.
A few nights later, I decided to surprise her and drove to her house. I saw the white pickup parked outside. I kept on driving. I could no longer be in denial. I went home and contemplated what needed to be done. I knew I had no choice but to break up with her. I saw her the next day and told her that I didn't need to see her anymore and that would be it.
I basically sulked at home the whole week when I wasn't at work. During that time, I realized that I didn't have any photographs of her. (When you got right down to it, I didn't have any photos of my first girlfriend, either.) I didn't want this to be a pattern. I called her up and asked if I could bring her over to my apartment to take some photos of her. She said she would. I picked her up. She had one of her nieces with her, who was five years old. We hung out at the apartment for a little bit and she allowed me to take a few photos. I was able to get a picture of us together by having her niece push down on the shutter button. Afterwards, I told her I missed her and that I still wanted to see her as friends. She agreed to this.
But that didn't stop the fighting. We still had disagreements that lasted up until the point that I quit my job at KZZO and moved to Denver. There's at least one interesting situation that is worth writing about from that period and it will come up later this week.
In tomorrow's post, I will explore my relationship with Marz with some perspectives that took me more than 25 years to sort out. I will also tell you what has happened to her since then. I promise some interesting twists that I never would have imagined.
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