Breakity Break

It looks like I'm going to have to go on another break from the blog. With the holidays approaching, I'm going to have a lot on my agenda. I've been posting on a daily basis (Monday - Friday) for 6 1/2 months, which is the longest I've gone without a break since I started this blog.

I was hoping I could keep up this pace through the end of the year. Alas, I am aware of my limitations.

On the bright side, I expect to start anew with the beginning of 2018. There are plenty of tight squeezes I have to get out of and loose time to get into.

In the meantime, enjoy the holidays, because you can't enjoy these donuts! (They're from Halloween! Talk about stale!)

Pain in the abs, Part 4

After Mom and Dend had left following my surgery, I went back to work. I had to go to the doctor for him to remove the stitches. When he did, it hurt like crazy! But it was real quick. He said I was healing quite nicely. However, I told him that if I coughed or sneezed, I could still feel it bulging out like it had done before the surgery. He said that was normal.

I did not engage in a lot of strenuous activity during the next two weeks. It still hurt a bit when I walked, but that started to subside. One day, I was crossing the street and the light turned yellow. Without thinking about it, I immediately started running to make it across in time. I realized after I'd gotten to the other side that I didn't feel any pain when I ran, so that meant I was definitely getting better.

I never had any more trouble with the hernia after that. After awhile, I found I was able to lift things again. I also noticed that the area stopped bulging out anytime I coughed or sneezed.

I decided to look into getting health insurance. My employer didn't offer any. However, I was a member of ASCAP and I thought I would call them to find out if they had a group insurance. It turned out they did. They sent me a brochure. They had one plan I could sign up for that would cost $50 a month. I recall there being a rather high deductible, but figured it was the best plan I could afford. I sent in the application and a money order.

A few weeks later, I got a letter from the insurance company. The envelope included my money order. My application for insurance had been denied because I had a pre-existing condition. That was the hernia. However, the insurance company indicated I could apply again in six months. (Where was Obamacare then?)

I went to get a refund on the money order. Because it was still made out to the insurance company, I had to pay $8 to get my money back!

It turned out that I wouldn't get insurance for two more years. This happened when I got a new job with benefits. I would not go the rest of my life without health benefits again.

Many years later, Loyd got a hernia and had to have a surgery. He had told the doctor about my hernia and that Grandma Ogolon had a hernia years earlier. The doctor told him that we likely had a genetic disposition that made us vulnerable to hernias and that it had little to do with the fact that he was moving furniture the day before his breach.

I've never had a surgery like that since. I've had to spend the night in a hospital, but that's a story for another time, way off in the future.

Pain in the abs, Part 3

In January of 1998, San Diego hosted Super Bowl XXXII. I submitted an application to be a volunteer. I waited for someone to call me, but no one ever did. I got a letter from the volunteer committee that stated that they had tried to contact me, but weren't getting a response. The letter also indicated that I needed to go through disability sensitivity training in order to be a volunteer. I called the phone number on the letter and left a message on their voice mail stating that no one had tried to call me and if they did, they weren't leaving messages.

(So, I guess that everyone who volunteers for the Super Bowl, including myself, gets the idea that they're going to get into the game for free. The first round of volunteers is contacted and their job is to call to recruit the other volunteers who have signed up. But that first group of volunteers wants to ensure that they get into the game, so they claim to make calls, but state they can't get a hold of anybody. This means they get to sign up for those prime positions.)

I called the other number in the letter to set up the training session. At the session, they had those of us who hadn't received assignments sign up for slots to be filled. What they had was working the NFL Experience. It's a kind of temporary NFL theme park set up at the stadium. I worked the Punt, Pass and Kick attraction. I helped to catch and return the footballs that were punted, passed and kicked. I was worn out by the end of the day. We were asked if we wanted to volunteer for another day, but I'd had enough. I did get a free T-shirt out of it.

Anyway, the organizers were supposed to throw a big party for all the volunteers as thanks. It was scheduled to occur a couple of weeks after the game. However, things fell through and there was no party. And I guess there was a lot of volunteers griping about the way they had been treated when they were trying to help out the city. (It wasn't just the party. Apparently, everyone had the same issues I had in trying to volunteer.) The Padres owners decided to step in and offered all the volunteers a free ticket to the home opener on April 7th, 1998 to help make up for the party that was canceled. The volunteers were also invited to take part in a pre-game presentation on the field. I had been sent a ticket and was looking forward to it.

However, I got my hernia and the Padres home opener was the day after my operation had been scheduled. I wasn't going to get to go. Since Mom and Dend were going to be there to help me recover, I asked Dend if he wanted to use my ticket. Mom said she also wanted to go to the game. There were arrangements for volunteers to buy extra tickets. I just had to go to the box office, give them my original ticket and offer to buy another ticket for $5 and they would give me two seats together. So Mom and Dend got to take part in an extra activity while they were visiting me.

The night before the game, I was recovering. Mom asked me what I wanted to eat for dinner. I told her I wanted pizza and that Dend could get Little Caesar's from the Kmart just down Texas Ave. at the bottom of the hill. He went out, got it and came back. I ate a few slices. However, my stomach was still sensitive from the surgery and I wound up throwing it all up. I felt bad. (But I did not vomit again for the rest of my recovery.)

The next day, Mom and Dend went to the Padres game. One of the extra perks with the volunteer ticket was that it was supposed to come with a voucher for a free hot dog and soda. Dend had the voucher, but couldn't use it at just any concession stand. There was a special stand set up for this and all the volunteers were there at the same time trying to get their free hot dogs and sodas. He had to wait a long time for that. He wasn't too happy and felt it wasn't worth the wait. And if he felt that way, that meant the volunteers probably felt that way. They got screwed over again.

I was able to stay by myself at home with no problems. I listened to the game on the radio. The Padres won 3 - 2 over the Cincinnati Reds in 10 innings. Just as I heard the game end, Mom and Dend came back. They had left a little early so they wouldn't have to deal with the crowd leaving the stadium and waiting for the light rail. They didn't regret missing the end of the game.

The rest of my recovery went well. Mom and Dend went back home and I was able to get back to work. I guess I was starting to feel a lot better since I mostly remember their experience with the game and very little of the suffering I had to endure during that time.

1998 happened to be the year that the Padres won the Division and went to the World Series. Mom and Dend enjoyed knowing they had attended the home opener of the team that got to play in the finals.

Tomorrow: The final word on this whole hernia experience.

Pain in the abs, Part 2

In yesterday's post, I described how I discovered I had a hernia and went about scheduling a surgery. I'd never had any kind of surgery before in my life. I hadn't even been in a hospital as a patient since I was born.

The first thing I had to take care of was cleaning up the apartment for Mom and Dend when they came up. Even though I knew about this for a few days, I decided to procrastinate until they called me from Yuma to let me know they were close. That meant I had three hours to clean stuff up. As it turned out, I came nowhere close to calculating the correct amount of time it would take for me to clean the place.

I also realized that I still needed to buy some new underwear for after the surgery. I needed a larger size because I knew I was going to have to keep ice on the incision area. I was able to enlist the help of Thoz, who was kind enough to run to Kmart to buy some briefs for me. (This was perhaps the only time in my adult life before I was married that I had a woman buy my underwear.)

Mom and Dend arrived and the apartment was still a mess. Mom complained about it, and she was right to do so. She helped to complete the cleaning. I felt really bad about that.

Because they came a couple of days before the surgery was scheduled, we decided to go to Disneyland. I was able to arrange with Chud to let us in for free. He was actually going to be there because his mom was in town to visit him. This was interesting because this was the first time since our recital in college 12 years earlier that I had seen his mother.

Mom, Dend and I had a good time at Disneyland. It was good to get out of the house and do something because we weren't going to get to do much of that while I was recovering. But nothing really eventful happened while we were there.

The next day was the surgery. Dr. A told me the procedure would take about an hour and I would be conscious. However, Mom said that while that was true, I probably wouldn't be aware of what was going on. I didn't know what to expect.

We arrived at the outpatient clinic. After going in the back and changing my clothes, I was taken into the operating room. The staff started administering the IV. After a few minutes, I heard a female medical assistant ask, "Should I shave the area?" I then heard her ask that again. And that was the last thing I remembered...

I woke up a little later. I could see the surgeon was working on me. I thought to myself, "Well, this is going to be one REALLY long hour." The anesthesiologist looked at me and asked, "Are you awake?" I nodded my head. "Okay, the doctor's just finishing up. You'll be out of here in a little bit." I thought, "Wow, did a whole hour just disappear from my life?"

After Dr. A was finished and the staff was wheeling me out, he said, "Oh, and I'm sorry about what happened to your penis!" I was still loopy from the drugs, but I probably figured he was kidding. "Oh, that's alright!" I guess he gets a kick out of doing that to the patients when they're still under the influence.

I got taken to recovery. I was given a cup of orange juice. I drank it and I fell back asleep. When I woke up, I was still holding the empty cup in my hand.

While I was in recovery, Dr. A came out to talk to Mom and Dend. However, Mom had been on pins and needles worrying about me and really needed to go to the bathroom. She held out as long as possible, but it got to the point she could no longer wait. That was when the doctor came out. He talked to Dend. He told him the surgery was a success and I was doing well. I talked throughout the procedure. (Really? What the heck was I talking about?) He also said I had a large hernia, about six or seven inches. But I would be fine now. Mom completely missed the doctor.

Mom and Dend drove me home. Then the real recovery began. More on that tomorrow.

Pain in the abs, Part 1

When Fraz and Jenz were roommates, I guess Jenz was a little put off by the fact that Fraz didn't have much actual furniture in her apartment. Fraz managed to get a couch from somewhere and needed my help moving it in. Fortunately, she had a pickup to transport it.

The three of us needed to move it from the pickup, across the driveway of the main house and down the stairs leading to the "in-law" unit where Fraz lived. Near the entrance to the stairs was a tree with thorns on it. As we were maneuvering the couch around the corner to the stairs, I felt one of the thorns pierce the left side of my nose above the nostril. It felt like it went in really deep. (Maybe an eighth of an inch, but that's still rather deep.)

We were able to get the couch in without any other problems. The three of us hung out for a bit before I went home.

The next morning, I felt some pain in my lower right abdomen when I was walking around. I didn't know what was going on. When I took a shower, I pressed down on the area. It was all "squishy, squishy, squishy." I thought, "Oh, that's not good." After walking around some more, I came to the conclusion that I had a hernia. And I didn't know what to do about it.

The pain wasn't constant. Every once in awhile, the breach in my abdominal wall would feel like it snapped back into place and I would be without pain for some time. Then, it would snap back out and I would have to apply pressure to it.

The first thing I did was go out an buy a new pair of jeans. The jeans I wore were probably a little small around the waist to begin with. This made me wonder if this contributed to the problem. Then I remembered moving the couch the day before. This may have also been a factor. However, I never felt the tear happen. Everything was fine when I went to bed the night before and I didn't feel any pain until I got up and started walking around.

After buying the jeans at the Miller's Outpost in the Fashion Valley mall, I immediately put them on and wore them out of the store. It helped relieve pressure on my waist, but I was still in pain. I recalled the images of trusses I had seen on TV and movies and decided to create a makeshift version. I went to Kmart and bought a large Ace bandage. I was able to stretch it around my waist and between my legs. This felt like it was holding everything in place, but I still had some pain here and there. I knew this was only going to be a temporary solution, but I didn't know where else to turn because I didn't have health insurance.

On top of this, I had planned a mini-vacation. Mom and Dend were going to be in Reno for a few days while he did some fire training for his job at the refinery in Artesia. In the previous year, Pacific Bell had created a rewards program in which you could earn points to go towards a number of promotions, including free airfare. They had a lot of premiums when the promotion was going on, but toward the end, the number of items you could get with your points dwindled dramatically. I just barely attained enough points for a free flight on Reno Air. I decided to use the points to go see Mom and Dend and do some gambling. I'd never been to Reno before.

The flight to Reno went very smoothly. Mom and Dend met me at the airport. Mom told me she had just won about $500 on a penny slot machine before I got there. I told her that was great, because I might need some of that money to go see a doctor while I was there. I told them about the hernia. I said that the pain was bearable, but I didn't know if I needed to go see a doctor. If it got a lot worse while I was there, it would need to be taken care of.

Fortunately, the hernia didn't feel like it was getting any worse during the visit, so I did not go see a doctor. I came back home and tried to figure out what to do next. Fraz told me that she found a low-cost clinic in San Diego and was able to set me up with an appointment. (She could be a good friend sometimes.)

The doctor who examined me told me I needed to go see a surgeon to get it patched up. She referred me to someone who she said would be able to assist a low-cost case. I called the number and set up an appointment. Dr. A was a man in his mid 50's. He felt the area and said it was a fairly large hernia. He recommended I have surgery to have a metal mesh patch inserted over the breach to hold the abdominal wall together. He said that while it wasn't a major issue now, eventually my small intestines would seep through the crack and work their way into my scrotum. The doctor's receptionist told me the procedure would cost $3000, including the doctor and outpatient facility charges. However, there may be a discount from the facility for their portion if their fees were paid upfront. I asked if they could take a credit card over the phone and she said they could.

I called my Mom up and asked her if she could pay for the outpatient facility fees. She said she could pay the facility, but I would need to pay the doctor fees myself. I agreed. Mom later decided that she and Dend would need to come out to San Diego to help me out when I needed the surgery. I went ahead and scheduled the surgery and told Mom when it was going to be taking place. They made their plans to drive to San Diego.

Tomorrow: I go under the knife.

No way to keep track of 2018

This nation is being torn apart and this is all I'm worried about right now:



When I find a solution, I'll be sure to post it. It's too bad the crises we face on a daily basis can't be solved by a YouTube video.

Fraz and Stad

Years before I met Fraz, she was involved in a long-term relationship with a woman named Stad. She told me about them going out and hanging around with other people. Fraz didn't really pay attention to the others because Stad was all she could see, she was that in love with her. She would come across women from time to time who knew her from back then, but she didn't recall meeting them.

Fraz showed me several photos of her and Stad together. It looked like they had a rather fun and interesting relationship. But the breakup, which I think involved Stad engaging in drug use, was apparently very devastating for Fraz.

I eventually got to meet Stad when she came to a barbecue at Fraz' house. I never got the full story about how she got invited, but Fraz warned me ahead of time that she was going to be there. Stad appeared to be somewhat inebriated. Fraz needed me to go to the store to get something and asked Stad to go with me. After we got in the car, I could sense Stad just STARING at me. I didn't look her way while I was driving, but I got the idea she was thinking, "I can't believe that Fraz lets you have sex with her!"

When we got to the store, Stad asked an employee for assistance and she helped us find the thing she was looking for. Stad was very happy and gave the woman a hug. I don't know what was going through the employee's mind. She probably didn't realize that she'd just been sexually harassed.

The whole time at the barbecue, I had a hard time seeing Fraz and Stad together, like they were in the photographs. But when the barbecue was over, Fraz asked someone to drive Stad home. Then, Stad started giving Fraz bedroom eyes and said, "No, I don't want to leave. I want to stay here with you. Please let me stay here with you." THEN I thought, "Okay, now I can see it." Fraz still made Stad go home. I'm pretty certain Stad thought Fraz and I were going to engage in activity of a sexual nature after she left.

Fraz and I saw Stad a couple more times after that. We met Stad at her workplace, which was a thrift store. We went out to dinner. Stad was very pleasant to be around when she was sober. But she didn't try any more moves on Fraz.

The last time I saw Stad was at the Adams Avenue Street Fair. I was watching SeasonChanger perform. I saw Stad in the back of the crowd. I went over and told her hi. She didn't remember me. I had to remind her that I was Fraz' friend. She acted like she remembered, but I don't think she really did. We talked for a little bit. I told Fraz about seeing Stad, but she didn't show much interest.

I never met another one of Fraz' past relationships again.