The Kiddie Table

Since this post is appearing on Thanksgiving, I thought I would take this opportunity to talk about a problem that plagued me from my childhood all the way up into my early adulthood. This was not something that only took place during Thanksgiving, but on a regular basis on Christmas and Easter as well.

Almost every holiday, my family would travel someplace, like Grandma Bend's house. There would be a lot of other relatives there, enjoying the fellowship of family. There would be one long table set up and a smaller table for the kids. After Grace was said and done, the parents would fill the plates for the kids and let them have at it at their table while the adults would enjoy their meal at the main table.

This was fine up until I turned 13 years old. It started getting irritating with the other cousins who seemed to prefer playing with their food instead of eating it, and then picking food off my plate and throwing it to the ground. I thought that would all end by the time I got to college, but I was wrong.

In 1984, my cousin Grid, who was a year older than me, had gotten married during the summer. That Thanksgiving, he and his wife came to my parents' house, along with Aunt Pand and the rest of her family. They all got to eat at the main table. Even though I was 20 years old at the time, I still had to eat at the kiddie table. (Also note that Loyd had to eat there too, but he was a senior in high school.)

I mentioned early in this blog about the culture in which my parents were raised. They were not considered adults until they got married. I had already reached the age my father was when he married my mother. In their eyes, I was not a grown-up because I did not have a wife. I felt like the kiddie table was punishment for not being on the path to providing them with grandchildren. (As if spending time with a bunch of kids was going to create any kind of incentive for me!)

I did not get to sit at the grown-up table until I was 35 years old. It was Christmas of 1999 and I was at my Aunt Cind's house for Christmas. They actually had enough room for me. However, they wound up having Loyd sit at the kiddie table. He was 32 at the time. After the seating arrangements had been set, it was determined that there had been enough room for Loyd if they had thought it out ahead of time. I felt like it was a step up for me, even though I still was nowhere close to getting married and wouldn't be for another six years.